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And even though I tried, it all fell apart
God only gives us tests which we will one day be able to overcome. That is why someday your wounds will heal and the day will come when you will overcome your suffering. And when that happens, I want to be there to see you smile from the bottom of your heart.
- Mikage Celestine ; Kapitel 41
Lightening up the post.
Friday 17 January 2014, 11:25 pm

Source

Well, it's Friday and here I am making a random blog post. I have to admit, this week has been a hectic week with back to back submission and all I can say is that it's crazy. There's so many things to be done, and yet there's so little time. I honestly thought that this week will be a horrible week throughout, but I have to admit, it got better as days went by. But all good things must come to an end and I felt that the week started to turn slightly foul in a way.

Extra lectures, more work, less sleep. Everything's pretty much piling up. I've been lacking sleep these days and I gotta say, my eye bags are getting darker as days go by and with more submissions coming up. It's about 6 more weeks till the holidays. That's like 1 more month. 1 more month of studying my ass off before relaxing for a whole month. And then year 2 will start and all hell will break loose once more.

Well, at least my Tuesday was nice. Not really gonna tell what happened, but it did make me smile and it did make my day end better than I thought it would, really. Slightly awkward meeting but thank you for making me smile. You definitely made my day better. Thank you whoever you are :) I mean, I wanna thank you but I honestly don't know who you are and I couldn't catch your name so.. I'll just thank you here, alright? 

VGHS is such a cool web series. I honestly love it and you know what? I can't wait for the season 3. Oh my god. I wanna know what's going to happen to Ted and Brian right now. Speaking of Brian, I still can't get rid of the image of Ted talking to Mr. Swan in C++. Seeing as how I do learn C++, hearing him say it really gets to me. And one reason is that I used to do that as well. But difference was, I used it to irritate people, not to impress. HAHAHAH.

When was the last time, I made such happy paragraphs on my blog, eh? Everything's so depressing on my blog so I thought, why not lighten it up a little. And maybe, I'll change the theme so it looks more lighter and happy. And maybe I'll start to feel happier as well.

Tomorrow's the City of Sharing and I gotta be at Kovan Hub by 7.30. What is life.

Goodnight guys~



What am I doing
Tuesday 7 January 2014, 11:00 pm

Artist

It's one of those days again. It's one of those days where I just want to punch something to make myself feel better. This is probably the third time I've felt this negative. The last time something like this happened, I nearly trashed my room. It felt that all the negativity that manifested in me wanted to escape and all I felt like doing was to do was to scream my lungs out and cry. I don't know why I've been feeling like this.

It just that... I've been thinking that what I've been doing for the past year was absolutely useless. Sure, I made great friends here in my course but is this what I really want in life? Is this what I'll be doing in the future? Most of the time, when I think about my future as someone who graduated from the course I'm in, the vision's all fuzzy. I can't paint a clear picture in my head. No matter how much I try, it's useless.

Maybe it's just me and my emotions fucking up these few days. I'm not really sure what's happening but I'm beginning to think being in this course is redundant to me. Of course, the course wasn't something I wanted to take. It has never been. It was a spur of the moment choice. Then again, how many of us out there are able to say "I got into the course that I really wanted!" or "I don't regret my course!"? 

As days go by in poly, I start to wonder why I'm in such a course. My mind's always blank, I can't seem to absorb anything during lectures, everything's a blur to me. What's happening? I don't know. My mind's all cloudy as I can;t think straight. Hopefully this will just pass. 

Maybe this negativity is just a fleeting emotion. 

Hopefully.